Working for the Weekend - Not

I'm so glad it's Friday. It was one of those weeks where it felt like Thursday by Tuesday. But somehow, I was able to get my brain in gear, get it together and get in good shape for next week.

I'm trying to strike a balance between acknowledging how I feel, but not feeling sorry for myself. I suppose my goal is: feel, don't dwell.

What I mean is this. Tonight I came home feeling like my head was going to pop because my ears were so clogged. Why were my ears clogged? I have no idea. Welcome to the cranial vice grip that is my sinus cavities. I have to get the house whipped into shape this weekend as much as I can, because on Monday night we are having an ADT person come by to see us about installing an alarm system. I don't want a complete stranger seeing the place messy.

I mean my house isn't dirty. I clean. But paper for example, seems to be the bane of my existence. My place is cluttered because there is next to no storage, and sometimes you just get battle fatigue having to engage in minor physics exercises everytime you want to find a spot for something. So I just want to get the house looking somewhat normal, but as usual, I feel overwhelmed at the prospect.

Then when I get feeling like this, I think about how much I hate the chipboard on the floor, how we haven't painted anything, how shabby our place can look and just what a bloody struggle the first few years in a house can be.

So I was overall, feeling a bit glum and sorry for myself. I was exhausted, it had been a tedious and tiring week at work, my friend gets her house burglarized, I'm like WTF?

So I go out and get The Constant Gardener to rent. The story takes place in Africa. Yes. You may remember that place. It's the continent the world has thrown away like a wet dish rag and left to the ravages of AIDS and famine to name just two blights.

At any rate, this movie and its exploration of corporate greed really brought home to me how truly awful my life could be, but isn't. I had a crappy week, but you know what? Tomorrow I'm going to get my hair done. I'm not walking 40 miles with my baby to some makeshift hospital hoping they have something to help me. It's almost as if the last few years have worn down my perspective, and it's good when these reminders to get a grip come along, even if they are as flippant as a movie rental.

I guess bad feelings are like the dentist. Stay as long as you have to, but not longer than you need to.