All week long I’ve been struggling somewhat. On Monday, I found myself feeling quite upset over the 9/11 ceremonies. Just remembering it all seemed overwhelming and so very sad. After that the work just piled on.
I have a presentation to do next week that I’ve been making no progress on.
I have a large project to manage that I really have no autonomy over so it’s extra challenging.
I keep having this weird thing where I don’t want to go to sleep until 1 a.m. Last night I made myself go to bed at 11 pm and go figure, actually woke up this morning feeling like a human being.
I also came to the disappointing conclusion yesterday that continuing my degree studies at UofT this year is just not going to happen. I was supposed to have my first class yesterday, the prospect of which only made me want to burst into tears.
Realistically, the pace at work is not going to let up for another few months, and the thought of going to a class after the kind of day I’d had sent shivers down my spine. After my experience a couple of years ago, I really didn’t feel like dropping over a thousand dollars for the priviledge of just barely passing a course. What would the point be really?
Sometimes I feel like all the things I want to do and be get comandeered by everything else. I wonder at what point I stop being the wind beneath someone or something else’s wings. I need to find more time for myself. Short of becoming a nun, I’m not exactly sure how I shall accomplish that.
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2 comments:
Hmmm you have to DEMAND time for yourself..come see the states!!! Travel...rent a movie, dance...pop in a Mary cd...lmao ya know live life!!!
It's a hard balance, that's for sure; but I'm guessing some of the groundwork you've laid in the these past few weeks in term of finances will go a long way in tipping the scales in your favour.
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